Day: December 16, 2024

Satire

ABC Cuts Ties with Alyssa Farah Griffin: ‘Wokeness is Impacting Our Ratings’

In a move that has sparked significant discussion in both the media and political spheres, ABC has decided to end Alyssa Farah Griffin’s contract, citing concerns over the impact of her embrace of “wokeness” on the network’s viewership. Griffin, who previously served as White House communications director and is known for her political commentary, had […]

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Satire

Bud Light Suffers $500 Million Loss Following Colin Kaepernick Partnership: “A Huge Mistake”

In a move that has rocked both the business and marketing worlds, Bud Light, one of the most recognizable beer brands globally, is facing a staggering $500 million loss. This significant financial hit comes as a result of a controversial partnership with former NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick, who has become a polarizing figure due to […]

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Satire

Primanti Bros Shuts Down All Locations in Red States, Says “That’s Not the America We Want”

In a bold and unexpected move, Primanti Bros, the iconic Pittsburgh-based sandwich chain, has announced the closure of all of its franchises in red states. The company’s decision was accompanied by a powerful statement: “That’s not the America we want.” This declaration has set off a firestorm of reactions, with people debating the intersection of […]

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Satire

Elon Musk to Purchase CBS After January 20th, Vows to Remove Wokeness from the Network

Elon Musk, the billionaire entrepreneur behind Tesla and SpaceX, has made headlines with his latest announcement: he plans to acquire CBS, one of the most prominent television networks in the United States, after January 20th. This move has generated significant buzz, particularly due to Musk’s stated goal of removing what he refers to as “wokeness” […]

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