PFATS Cancels Scholarships Of 10 Players For Anthem Kneeling, “Kneel For The Flag”
In a move that has sent shockwaves through the sports world, the Professional Football Athletic Trainers Society (PFATS) has announced the cancellation of scholarships for 10 NFL students who were found guilty of the unforgivable sin of kneeling during the national anthem. This bold decision has been met with both cheers and jeers, depending on […]
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Breaking: Dennis Quaid’s New Anti-Woke Movie Reagan Breaks All Records, Earns $1 Billion in One Week
In a stunning triumph that has left Hollywood buzzing, Dennis Quaid’s latest film, Reagan, has shattered box office records, raking in an unprecedented $1 billion within its first week of release. The movie, which offers a fresh take on the life and legacy of Ronald Reagan, has resonated deeply with audiences across the globe, proving […]
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Coach Elway Makes It Clear: “Anthem Kneeling Will Result in a Ban From the Team”
In an era where professional athletes have become as known for their political stances as for their prowess on the field, one legendary coach is taking a hardline approach that’s making waves in the sports world. John Elway, former NFL star and current head coach of the Denver Broncos, has issued a no-nonsense decree: players […]
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Breaking: ABC Removes Whoopi Goldberg And Joy Behar From The View Season 28, “Enough Of Their Toxicity”
In a move that has left daytime television viewers stunned and social media ablaze, ABC has announced that Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar will not be returning for Season 28 of The View. The decision, which was reportedly made after months of internal discussions, was summarized in a terse statement from the network: “We’ve had […]
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Breaking: ESPN Removes Brittney Griner from GOAT List, “She’s Not a Good Person”
In a shocking and somewhat baffling move that has left the sports world buzzing, ESPN has decided to remove Brittney Griner, one of the most dominant figures in women’s basketball, from their prestigious GOAT (Greatest of All Time) list. The reason? According to an anonymous source within the network, Griner was deemed “not a good […]
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Elon Musk: “We Should Get Rid Of All Electronic Voting Machines”
In an unexpected twist that has left both tech enthusiasts and political analysts scratching their heads, Elon Musk, the billionaire entrepreneur known for his innovative ventures and futuristic visions, has made a bold proclamation: it’s time to get rid of all electronic voting machines. Yes, the man who wants to colonize Mars, implant chips in […]
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Breaking: Colin Kaepernick’s Plea to Participate in the Olympics 2024 Rejected Instantly by the Committee, “You’re Too Woke for the Game”
Folks, wake up and smell the coffee. The former NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick has been ditched for getting into the Olympics 2024. But why? Because the Olympics has rejected his application, saying, *You are too woke for the game.” YES!!! You heard it right. Oh, come on! The boy wants to get in… let him […]
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Breaking: Netflix Loses Almost 10 Million Subscribers in a Day After Big Donation
Hello America! Let me stun you guys with Netflix’s recent gigantic loss. Yes, you got it right. But why? What went wrong? Why did users get offended? Well, folks, hold down… Netflix’s CEO and Co-Founder, Wilmot Reed Hastings Jr., just donated $7 million to Kamala Harris’ presidential campaign. But wait… This big buck donation is […]
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Breaking: Netflix Suffers a Loss of $10 Million in A Day After Going Woke
Netflix faced a huge backlash from netizens for their bold move to save the world. Netflix has become the weakest streaming platform on earth, woah! And what happened? They lost $10 million just in a day, damn! The same Netflix that used to give you a bird box will now bring you to the grand […]
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Breaking: Denzel Washington Drops Out of $500 Million Project With Netflix, “The Company Has Gone Woke”
The Hollywood A-lister actor and Oscar-winning star, none other than “Denzel Washington,” has left everyone speechless and sent shockwaves through the world. Denzel has just dropped the flagship project with Netflix because he can’t tolerate their “wokeness” anymore. In an exclusive interview, Denzel shared his thoughts about his bold move. (Obviously, he can afford such […]
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