Dunkin’ Donuts CEO Reveals A Loss of $1 Billion Since Going Woke: “We’re Sorry, Won’t Try That Again”
In a shocking revelation that has sent tremors through the fast-food industry, Dunkin’ Donuts CEO Dave Hoffmann has admitted that the company has suffered a staggering $1 billion loss after what he described as their ill-fated foray into “woke” politics. The confession, made during a hastily organized press conference outside the company’s Canton, Massachusetts headquarters, […]
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Tim Walz Is Thinking of Leaving the Country Permanently: “I’ve Lost It”
In what may be the most unexpected twist in a 2024 election season already filled with plenty of surprises, Minnesota Governor and Democratic vice-presidential nominee Tim Walz is reportedly considering leaving the country for good. Yes, you read that correctly: Walz, the man who has spent his entire career advocating for the people of Minnesota, […]
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Shaq Throws Tim Walz Out of His Restaurant: “Don’t Come Back Here, You’re a Disappointment”
In what can only be described as a cross between a reality TV show and a political roast, NBA legend and restaurateur Shaquille O’Neal reportedly threw Minnesota Governor and Democratic vice-presidential nominee Tim Walz out of his Atlanta restaurant, Big Chicken, with the booming declaration, “Don’t come back here, you’re a disappointment!” The incident, which […]
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