Beyoncé Gets Banned From CMA For Life After Receiving No Nominations For Her Country Album: “She Can Never Be Country”
In a stunning and unexpected turn of events, Beyoncé, one of the world’s most beloved and celebrated artists, has been permanently banned from the Country Music Association (CMA) after her latest album, Cowboy Carter, failed to receive a single nomination. The decision, which many are calling both draconian and absurd, was allegedly based on one […]
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Taylor Swift Endorses Kamala Harris: “She’s My Role Model and Perfect for Our Country”
In a shocking move that has sent Swifties and political pundits alike into a frenzy, pop sensation Taylor Swift has officially endorsed Vice President Kamala Harris for president, declaring, “She’s my role model and perfect for our country.” While some might have expected Swift to stay focused on re-releasing her old albums or fighting with […]
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International Olympic Committee Bans Paris From Hosting Future Games: “They Went Too Far With Wokeness and Satanism”
In a shocking yet somehow inevitable turn of events, the International Olympic Committee (IOC) has announced that Paris will be permanently banned from hosting future Olympic Games following the controversial opening ceremony of the 2024 Olympics. Citing a combination of “wokeness” and “satanic themes,” the IOC declared that the City of Light had crossed a […]
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Following Chiefs, Steelers Also Announce Boycott of Pride Nights: “It’s Purely Woke and Satanic”
In a shocking move that has sent fans, critics, and even Satanists into a tailspin, the Pittsburgh Steelers have announced their official boycott of Pride Nights, citing concerns over what they call the “woke and satanic” nature of the events. The announcement comes hot on the heels of a similar statement by the Kansas City […]
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NFL Issues Permanent Ban on ‘Black National Anthem’: “There’s Only One National Anthem”
In a move that has sent shockwaves across stadiums and social media feeds, the NFL has reportedly banned the performance of “Lift Every Voice and Sing,” commonly referred to as the Black national anthem, at all future games. According to insiders, this decision comes after several seasons of quietly weaving the song into pre-game ceremonies […]
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