Just in: Kathy Griffin Files for Bankruptcy, Cites Elon Musk as Cause
Los Angeles, California – Comedian Kathy Griffin is filing for bankruptcy after a series of unfortunate events that she claims were caused by none other than the tech billionaire Elon Musk. According to sources close to Griffin, the trouble began when she decided to purchase a Tesla Model S, Musk’s flagship electric car. Griffin, known […]
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Trump Campaign Sues The View for $200 Million: “They Tell Terrible Lies”
Washington D.C. – In the latest legal move from former President Donald Trump’s campaign team, the organization has filed a $200 million lawsuit against the popular daytime talk show The View. The campaign alleges that the show’s hosts, including Whoopi Goldberg, Joy Behar, and Sunny Hostin, have repeatedly told “terrible lies” about the former president. […]
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John Elway Takes a Firm Stand: ‘Kneeling on My Field Will Result in Immediate Termination’
In a stunning announcement today, Denver Broncos General Manager and Hall of Fame quarterback John Elway declared that any player who kneels during the national anthem on his field will be immediately fired. “Listen, I understand the importance of free speech,” Elway began at a press conference. “But when it comes to disrespecting our country […]
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Whoopi, Joy, and Sunny Threaten To Resign ‘Immediately’ If Candace Owens Joins The Panel
In a stunning turn of events, the co-hosts of The View, Whoopi Goldberg, Joy Behar, and Sunny Hostin have all threatened to quit the show “immediately” if conservative commentator Candace Owens is added to the panel. Sources close to the hosts say they are outraged by the mere suggestion of Owens joining the show, citing […]
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Backlash Against “Woke” Peter Pan Results in Record-Low Pre-Sale for Disney
Disney’s highly anticipated “Woke Peter Pan” reboot appears to be in serious trouble, as reports indicate that it has had the worst pre-sale numbers in the company’s history. According to sources close to the project, the film, which aims to modernize the classic tale of Peter Pan with a “woke” twist, has been met with […]
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ABC Legal Parts Ways with The View Co-Host Sunny Hostin: “She’s a Lawsuit Waiting to Happen”
In a shocking turn of events, ABC Legal has terminated the contract of The View co-host, Sunny Hostin, citing concerns that she is a “lawsuit waiting to happen.” According to insiders at the network, Hostin has been a liability for some time due to her tendency to speak her mind on controversial topics. “Let’s just […]
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Jon Voight Unleashes On Whoopi Goldberg On The View: “Get The F**K Out If You Don’t Like It Here”
In a recent interview on The View, Jon Voight, the Academy Award-winning actor known for his conservative views, lost his cool with co-host Whoopi Goldberg. The heated exchange began when Goldberg challenged Voight on his support for former President Donald Trump, citing his controversial policies and statements. Voight, who has been a vocal supporter of […]
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Roseanne Barr Offered $100 Million by CBS to Pen a New Sitcom
CBS has made an outrageous offer to disgraced comedian Roseanne Barr – $100 million to write a new sitcom. Yes, you read that right. The same Roseanne Barr who was fired from her hit show in 2018 for making racist and offensive comments on Twitter. According to CBS executives, they believe that Barr has served […]
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